How to Move Beyond False Guilt

How to Move Beyond False Guilt

The guilt of leaving my husband and flying across the country to spend a week nurturing my mind, body, and spirit seemed selfish. I had planned this trip months prior and I was stoked about it. However, as the day drew near to depart, my mind kept whispering…

“Back out.”

“You don’t deserve this.”

“You should spend that money on something more important.”

“Why are you so selfish?”

These whispers came from all directions, yet no one was voicing them out loud. Even my husband was super supportive of me going. So, what was up with the heavy cloak of guilt? The day before I left, I took some intentional quiet time, and began journaling. I wrote this question at the top of my page, “Why false guilt?”, and then I asked My Creator to speak his truth and show me where this guilt was coming from. And then, I listened!

The first thing I heard was, “You KNOW you are worth it, but you don’t BELIEVE it!”  I pondered those words for a moment and tears began streaming down my face. I knew I was worth it, but something still deep within me did not believe I was worth taking the time to take care of myself.  I realized at that moment that taking care of everyone else was easier, validating, and applauding – right? I felt good about myself when I was helping others, doing for others, and taking care of others needs, and yet when I began taking care of my own ——— GUILT WOULD BEAT THE DOOR DOWN SCREAMING “YOU ARE NOT WORTH IT. YOU ARE SELFISH!”. 

You know the guilt for putting yourself first – right? Think about anything you have done for yourself lately to nourish your heart, mind, body, and spirit. 

Did you hear any whispers saying…

  • You should not spend this money on yourself. 
  • You shouldn’t be away from your family.
  • You should be working, giving, helping, & doing for others.
  • You are not worth this.
  • Who do you think you are?
  • This is selfish! You are selfish!

Why do we know (with our heads) we are worth taking care of and yet still secretly believe (with our hearts) that we are not?

God’s Word says: in Matthew 22:37-39 “Jesus declared, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself’.”

Love your neighbor as yourself! AS YOURSELF!? How are you loving yourself? It is this last little nugget that we easily miss. And I believe this is one of the biggest nets the enemy traps God’s daughters in. Therefore, we are running around like chickens with our heads cut off serving-serving-serving, doing-doing-doing, and helping-helping-helping. And yes, these are all “good things”, but we are missing the gold. 

We are great at loving others and terrible at loving ourselves. We know we are worthy, but we don’t fully believe it. This lie quietly disconnects us from the truth and allows us to settle for the instant gratification of helping others rather than taking care of ourselves mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. 

The waves of guilt and “selfless” living are consuming us and yet we still silently long for deep connection and nourishment —  because we are made for it.

CAN YOU RELATE? Have you ever felt guilty for nourishing yourself?

Well, it is time my beautiful friend to cut the nets and break free of the false guilt! 

It is time to take off the cloak of lies and be lavished in the wild love of God. And in this lavishing, a whole new journey of loving yourself the way your Creator loves you awaits. 

You see, I know! Because I have experienced it. By taking this trip, I showed up for myself and I received way more than I paid for. My mind, body, and spirit were nourished and the week was truly life-changing. But it took me choosing to take off the false cloak of guilt and say yes to what more God had for me.  It took me saying yes to me. I would have missed so much if I would’ve stayed stuck in the false guilt. 

Are you ready to say yes to you? It does not have to be an out of town event.

In my new 6-week Online Program, “Fully Alive” – Living the Authentic Awakened Life! I am coming alongside heart-centered women, to help them uncover and embrace their truest selves while radically accepting and loving themselves in the process. It is a beautiful journey to wholeness – physically, spiritually, emotionally, and mentally.

Are you ready to just be yourself? Do you even know her? What does it look like for you to love yourself and radically accept who you are? Are you ready to show up for yourself and remove the false cloak of guilt? 




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